


Knight In Shining Armor Ultimatum Side Story

by spinsters_grave



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Everyone has a potty mouth, Gen, HAPPY ANNIVERSARY VOLTRON, I didn't include the romance b/c I'm a square, Shiro is a knight and Lance Pidge and Hunk are all con artists, So the basic premise of that fic is that Keith is Thirsty™, The fic that inspired this is shklance but that is Not Obvious here, and that he's a prince, it's an au. It's specifically a Rapunzel!AU, its a crack fic, sarah why did you decide to write a sex-based story when you're ace, why is shiro hanging out with them? Because he wants to arrest them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 14:05:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11163405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinsters_grave/pseuds/spinsters_grave
Summary: I wrote this for my friend's birthday. Sarah I hope you're proud. Sarah are you proud. SarahA side story for Sarah's fic, A Knight In Shining Armor Ultimatum.





	Knight In Shining Armor Ultimatum Side Story

**Author's Note:**

  * For [girlskylark](https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlskylark/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Knight In Shining Armor Ultimatum](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11122953) by [girlskylark](https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlskylark/pseuds/girlskylark). 



“So if _you’re_ holding Keith, and _I’m_ holding Keith, then who’s flying the plane?” Lance called over to Shiro.

“Lance, you’re not holding anything except the shreds of your dignity,” Pidge cut in before Shiro could reply. He wasn’t going to speak anyway. “And stop throwing around words that don’t make sense! What the fuck is a _plane?”_

Lance stuck out his tongue at her. “Gremlin. No one feed this thing after midnight!”

“What does that even _mean!”_

“It means shut up, is what it means!”

“Guys, be quiet,” Shiro said from the back of the pack. He shifted Keith up his back slightly.

“Oh, okay, the last person we need to hear from is _the knight that forgot to bring his noble steed,”_ Lance argued. “This walk? This unnecessary walk is _your fault._ We could be getting saddle sores instead!”

“STOP COMPLAINING,” Pidge said, very loudly. A number of birds burst through the trees and flew away, cawing. Hunk stopped in the middle of the road, and the rest of the group moved around him like a river around a stone; his mouth moved silently, and his fingers waved.

“Darn it,” he said, dropping his hand. “There were either six or nine of them.”

Pidge and Shiro stopped. “What does it matter,” Pidge asked. “It’s just birds.”

“They were magpies,” Hunk said, still staring at the sky. It was iron gray and cold, and in the distance, storm clouds threatened. “Six for gold and nine for a kiss. Come on, guys, you know the nursery rhyme.”

Pidge scoffed. “I know that nursery rhymes are dumb and childish. Come on, let’s just get out of here before it fucking pours.”

“You know what, that’s crazy coincidental,” Lance called back. “Gold and kissing? With the Prince himself on Shiro’s back? Nursery rhymes are known for predicting shit in stories like this.” He got closer to Pidge, but only to tap underneath her chin in a patronizing manner. “Keep up, gremlin.”

Pidge growled at him. “ _You_ keep up. Let’s just get out of here. They were _birds_. Who gives a shit about _birds.”_

Shiro shifted Keith up his back more. The Prince was still delirious from hitting his head; he would murmur some crazy things from time to time, but enough that the rest of the group largely ignored him.

“You know, if anyone should be giving orders, it should be me,” Shiro said. “I’m the senior officer.”

“We’re not King’s Guard, or whatever,” Pidge snipped. “Your senior officer-iority means _nothing_ to me. Ya hear? _Nothing.”_

“I only listen to him because he’s hot,” Lance said. He shot Shiro a dumb grin that he must have thought was flirtatious.

Shiro’s face pulled down. He shifted Keith up on his back once more, then trudged on through the forest. Pidge, Hunk, and Lance were pulled along in his wake.

***

When it rains, it pours. It became so bad that the team rushed to find an under cropping of rocks to hide underneath. Pidge and Lance took their entertainment from listening to Keith mutter in his sleep, while Hunk and Shiro held a quiet conversation closer to the sheet of water.

“Are you going to take any of the money?” Hunk asked.

Shiro took off his gauntlet. Silently, Hunk marveled at how strong Shiro must be---the man wore full armor and chainmail, carried around his sword, and still had carried the Prince on his back for what must have been miles.

“I don’t know,” Shiro said. “I didn’t really want to become part of this whole thing at all. Keith is alright, I guess, but he’s pushy---and he’s not afraid of cajoling people into doing what he wants.”

“He’s royalty,” Hunk pointed out. “And still, you went through this whole thing without especially searching it out. Don’t you think you deserve, you know, a reward for that?”

Shiro looked at Hunk for a long moment. A couple drops of rain landed on the knees of his armor, then more joined them, and they collected into a small puddle that would make the metal rust if it wasn’t treated right.

“There are other ways of getting money,” Shiro finally said. He forced himself to look away from Hunk and instead stared into the rain. It made the forest look like something sinister. “I have a salary, too. I don’t have to rely on getting this reward to support myself like you do.”

He didn’t exactly answer Hunk’s question, but that was alright. Hanging out with the sort of people Hunk did made him not expect answers from anyone. He'd learned not to give answers easily, himself.

Hunk and Shiro sat in silence for much longer, listening to both the rain and the muted sounds of Pidge and Lance messing around in the background.

Shiro suddenly stood up and stretched. “We should sleep. The rain isn’t going to let up any time soon.”

Pidge scoffed. “This doesn’t seem right. Rain doesn’t _act_ like this here. It’s never this heavy for this long.”

Lance shrugged, then punched her gently on the shoulder. “The weather can act however it wants. Who are we insolent mortals to even begin to question the mysterious workings of fate?”

Pidge rolled her eyes. “You’re crazy.”

Lance smirked at her and bowed dramatically. “Simply easily duped when it comes to the mystical, my dear. Who knows? Might it be a witch, or the workings of God Himself? Either way, the rain’s not letting up, and we are unfortunately stuck together. Let us hope we do not stab each other while sleeping.”

“I would never,” Shiro said, at the same time Pidge said, “No promises.”

Lance shot Pidge an unimpressed look. “No one give the gremlin anything sharp. Capiche?”

Pidge looked at Hunk. Hunk shrugged.

***

Later that night, Pidge and Hunk lay curled together. Pidge acted like a warm stone for Hunk, who slept better next to hot things.

Pidge rolled onto her side. Sleeping on a forest floor was not the best; she knew her back was going to hurt in the morning. But it was better than being in the driving rain.

Hunk snorted in his sleep and shifted. Pidge closed her eyes tightly, like that would bring sleep faster.

“Hunk,” she whispered. No response, so she dug her elbow into Hunk’s stomach, hard. She had been complimented before on the sharpness of her elbows. “Hunk,” she whispered to him again.

Hunk grumbled. “Yeah?”

“Are you up?”

“I am _now.”_

“Listen,” she said, rolling to face her partner. “Do you want to just ditch these guys? Grab the prince and run? We could.”

Hunk tsked. “Aw, but it’s raining. And Keith would wake up and make a huge fuss.”

“Yeah, but we’d have all the money,” Pidge pointed out. “We probably wouldn’t get turned in, and we can pay off our crimes, and we wouldn’t have to split it with him.” She pointed her thumb at Lance.

“Yeah, but it’s raining,” Hunk said, like that was supposed to explain everything. “Go to sleep, Pidge. We’ll ditch them in the morning.”

Pidge groaned. “It’s now or never, Hunk. Come on! Up! Up!”

Hunk groaned in response and flipped over so his back was to Pidge. She pouted and started poking Hunk’s shoulder blades.

Hunk reached behind himself to swat at her. “You stop that.”

“Never,” Pidge hissed. “Come! Run away with me! We’ll be free as birds!”

“No,” Hunk grumbled. “The magpies didn’t predict that.”

“Who _cares_ about the fucking magpies, Hunk,” Pidge said, probably louder than what was appropriate, because Shiro and Lance both woke up and demanded she go to sleep. She stuck out her tongue, not like they could see it, but flopped down on the forest floor anyway and demanded sleep to come to her.

***

The rain had let up over the night. Somehow, despite being plagued by their respective thoughts, personal gremlin-demons, and worries, everyone had gotten some amount of sleep.

Shiro stood at the edge of their outcropping and posed like he was checking the skies. Lance thought he was just doing it to look hot. And damn him because it was working.

“Looks like the storm has cleared up,” Shiro declared. He returned briefly to grab up Keith again.

“No shit,” Lance scoffed, crossing his arms. “An actual hint of the sun wasn’t enough for you?”

Shiro didn’t rise to the bait. “We can make it back into town in a couple of hours if we hurry. And then we’ll all do whatever we need to do.”

Lance glanced at Pidge and Hunk. No comment on his thoughts.

“Let’s get going, then,” Hunk said. “What are we waiting for? Breakfast? None of us came prepared for it, and you know that. We should just go.”

There was slight grumbling from the rest of the team, but they gathered themselves and their equipment.

The forest welcomed them into itself again. Not that they had actually left, but Lance thought that this time, it was mildly significant.

Birds chattered to each other in the trees. Hunk paused again, counting silently, and Pidge came to stop. She exhaled exasperatedly. “Again? Come on, Hunk! We have places to go and money to get!”

“Ten,” Hunk said. “Ten for a bird not to be missed.”

“Let’s _go,”_ Pidge said, and they went.

 

 

END

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Happy birthday! I hear you're ancient history. Did you trade spices and gold in sub-Saharan Africa or am I getting my hopes up
> 
> For literally anyone else who reads this ficshit: definitely written for @geewillikers shitfic, which is not for the faint of heart but is also really dumb but I love it anyway: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11122953/chapters/24825909 Go read it! Mine's more serious in tone than her's and that was a m i s t a k e
> 
> Hap borth bonch


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